Here we have our first external [ meaning it is not my experience, but someone else's] post of someone who has gone through an experience that really affected his life, and may affect the course of his life. in the way his life turns out, in the near future and the distant future. as well as shaping his thoughts as an individual. i hope other can benefit from his critical reflections:
Up until the 1st of May, Everything seemed on track for me. I have always been that boy who just loved to excel. From a very young age, I was thought never to settle for second best. Now, this is not to say that I am a genius, it is far from who I really am. More often than not, I always fell below the standards I set for myself, I know you'll say that's a good thing because it made me a force to reckon with amongst my peers, but most of the times, it always left me angry about what could have been if only I tried harder. My dad never really cared about the details of my efforts, all that mattered to him was results. And in over 20 years of academic involvements, the pursuit of excellence now runs in my DNA.
I have a good track record of keeping the right friends close to me, and I believe it helps define who I am. I hate the fact that I didn't make a first class honours in University, but I always take pride in the fact that I had a 2.1, and even first class candidates took me as one of them because no matter how talented the group I find myself, I always had a lot to contribute. An undying thirst for knowledge and excellence made me to travel abroad for further studies, and trust me, from the blast of the whistle; I got off to a flying start. Answering questions in class, initiating intuitive and intellectual discussions and to cap it all up, a B3 overall grade in the first stage of the session (which is a big deal here)
It couldn't get any better, I was on course for what would be the greatest honour of my life, to finish with a distinction. but to be sincere, getting a distinction wasn't priority for me, I would be more than happy with a merit, but anything less will be considered a waste of time and resources, as my dad always told me, "the end justifies the means"
On the 1st of May, out of over-carefulness and the quest for perfection, and of course with a measure of ignorance, I sent my research paper by e-mail to a friend to help check for errors with her own account as I had no access to the such programs. This decision, born out of the fear of failure, proved a dramatic turnaround in my academic experience. My final submission was detected as a plagiarised copy of the draft which my friend accidentally uploaded as it turned out; I had committed the abominable offence as a student. Only two weeks before I was told this, I received a rare commendation from the program leader about the same essay and was to have the work published. As it turned out, I went from grace to grass in 14 days. Such is life. Inasmuch as the punishment of plagiarism (stealing in literature) which a strong part of me takes objection to, because I don't believe one can steal from oneself, has been reduced, the outcome could still have far reaching consequences, I stand a chance of not been eligible to get a merit when I could easily have been on course for a distinction.
I know these sounds like a kid crying over spilt milk, what can I do? I already made it clear that it runs in my DNA. If I were carefree, I wouldn't have bothered to check the originality of my work, and I wouldn't even bother if I had a merit or a pass or whatever. But do I really want to be carefree; do I know how to be carefree? The answer is No. Who am I really living for? Do I care too much about what my folks will make of my performance? Well, I don't live for my folks but I do appreciate their sacrifice for me and I would go as far as being distressed to make them happy. That's how much I value their efforts
This incidence has thought me a lot, it has showed what a friend I am to a lot of people, A lot of classmates have looked beyond the competition to show their deepest concern, some even took it upon themselves to seek advice on my behalf. I will always be indebted to these people. It has also thought me that life isn’t judged based on intention, only God cares about intention. It has showed what a thin line exists between Glory and Shame.
An amazing friend of mine studying in U.I has also been more than wonderful. She practically made my burden hers and went out of her way to show affection, support, consolation and what have you. I cannot repay her for what she made herself to be in such a devastating period, but I hope she gets all her heart desires.
One thing I ask from the Almighty is to make things get back on track for me before I complete this course, and most importantly, if I have failed to make my parents proud at this stage, may He give me a bigger opportunity to do so in the near future.
